Working Mums in the UK
Working Mums in the UK

Life is currently hard on all fronts!  Job security seems to be a thing of the past, money is too tight to mention and it is really hard to maintain a good work-life balance, even if you are single, but if you are a Mum and you are working then it can feel like life is pretty tough indeed.

But the one thing to bear in mind, is that the days of SuperMum, who held down a massive job in the city, whilst raising 10 children and finding time to write 6 books and make all her own bread are over. Nowadays people are more realistic about what it is like to have babies or children and be working as well and possibly the only person who has unrealistic expectations is you. Everyone else is probably amazed at how well you are doing, but you probably think that you aren’t working hard enough on all fronts. So be realistic and lower your expectations: the world will not collapse if the dusting is not done as regularly as before or the ironing isn’t always dealt with immediately- and you really don’t have to be the last person in the office every night!

So if you are aware that things wont be perfect, at least all the time, then you should find going back to work easier. In fact returning to work after having maternity leave or when your children are a little older should not be seen as a negative thing. Many women say it helps give them a sense of self that can disappear at home and that it helps to be able to bring in another wage and the extra money certainly comes in handy for many.

Employers are also now recognising that the skills that women have in the home, when bringing up children, are good organisational skills and so they recognise child experience as being of worth.

Although the current jobs market is particularly tight, there are jobs around and if you don’t see ones that you immediately like, then why not think about contacting a recruitment agency, just to keep your options open? Now all you have to do is to think about how you will spend the extra cash you have coming in!

In these ‘credit crunch’ times, everyone is concerned about money, making money, saving money, making sure bills can be paid, but for mothers considering returning to work it can often be a difficult choice, since working may mean that you aren’t much better off. 

The choice is no longer simple. Before it used to be a case of stay at home with your children or go to work and be better off. But everyone has read media reports about how mums have gone back to work and found out that they really aren’t much better off at all.

Well the good news is that there is help available in the form of Working Tax Credits, which means that your income will effectively be topped up. You can also access government assistance with nursery or crèche bills, in many, although not all, instances.

The benefits of returning to work can also mean that you are well placed to start climbing the career ladder again, so this can be a hidden benefit from returning to work.

But the reality is that if you are working in a very low paid occupation, you may well find that you are working long hours and are not much better off than if you stayed at home and provided childcare yourself. So what should you do? Well if that is the case, then it may be worth returning to work and then trying to find a better paid job, through registering with a n employment or recruitment agency and applying for lots of different positions. Remember that it is always easier to find a job whilst you are employed than if you are not in work, so whilst working can damage your wealth, at least it gives you the chance to turn this around and start making it improve your wealth!

In the UK, stress is a big, big issue. For example, there were almost 14 million working days lost in the UK, in 2006-07, due purely to stress, anxiety or depression. Stress, if untreated can lead to all sorts of problems such as chronic anxiety or depression, heart problems and low self esteem, which can then lead to substance abuse, for example drinking too much or smoking etc.

When people are experiencing stress it is often quite difficult for them to achieve a good work-life balance and they end up focussing almost completely on work and forgetting not just about themselves, but also about children, relationships and people to whom they are close, which can often create relationship problems on top of everything else.

So how you cope if your job is getting you down? Well, the first thing to do is to try and take positive action to reduce the causes of stress in the workplace and only you can know what they are. Talk to your manager or if s/he is a major cause of your stress, talk to Human Resources or someone else in management. Be honest and try to be constructive in how you outline what has been stressing you.

Away from work, take time out and ensure that you relax at least for a part of every day. You should also think about work and what it means to you. If you are in a highly stressful career or in an environment that seems to breed stress, then it may be worth talking to a recruitment agency about other options that may be available to you. This isn’t about running away, it is simply making sure that you don’t end up sacrificing your health for your job! Your health is too important to risk and no one is indispensable, even if you don’t think that is true: it is!

Going back to work after a period of maternity leave, whether you are returning to the same employer or branching out with a new employer is always a difficult thing to do. There are lots of things to make you nervous and any mum who says that she wasn’t nervous about returning to work is probably not being honest.

For a start there are practical things to think about. Who has been doing your work while you have been away? Have they done it well or made a mess of it? Have they done it too well?

What about your baby, babies or your children: how are they going to cope without Mummy there 24 hours per day? How will you cope without them?  What will life be like when you drop them off at the Childminders or Nursery?

Some women feel differently about work when they return. They may have missed the money when they were off on maternity leave and find that maternity pay just doesn’t go very far, but then when they come back to work, they find that things have changed, personnel may have altered or the way things are done may have altered. But this doesn’t mean that if you do go back to work, you have to just ‘put up’ with a situation that has altered and one you may no longer like: if you do go back and don’t like your work, then you can keep an eye out for another position. You could even consider going to work as a temp or registering with a local recruitment agency and in these ways you can ensure that you keep all your options open.

So don’t be afraid of going back to work, just look on it as the next step in life’s journey. You may go back and immediately love it, or you may go back and find out that you want something different. You may miss your baby or children terribly, or you may relish the freedom, but until you try it, you won’t know how you will react, so go for it!